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Buffet Survival Strategies
Fall has arrived. And so have the savings.
So I thought I would comment on Spam. Below are the most recent 12 emails I received this morning. This stuff is worse than the circulars I get in my mailbox. It would seem there is little that can be done to stop this hideous onslaught of this most always unwelcome and quite frequently offensive drivel. You can put all the filters you want on your mailbox and what often happens is you will filter out the important stuff and get something about male testosterone boosters.
Looking at this list, at least it’s not obscenely offensive. Let’s examine each e-mail one by one shall we? I may qualify for financial aid huh? OK, fishing expedition…sorry I don’t need it. Of course the very next e-mail makes the bold statement that a credit score of 750 is “great”! So if I get the financial aid I’m guessing that the second e-mail would be irrelevant?
To speak to the third e-mail…..I’ve got plenty of certifications and just keeping them up is enough, thank you! Another fishing expedition that will get them nowhere with me. I wonder how many people respond to this junk. Enough, apparently to justify its annoying frequency.
I don’t want to look inside to get my free Walmart groceries for a year….just give them to me and we can each go our merry way.
The next one just makes me wonder why 51% off? Why not 50 or 55? Is this a psychological way to make more folks notice? I guess in my case it worked on some level.
OK, the 7 day forecast is something I can use with the exception of the fact that they only stand a chance of getting tomorrow’s weather somewhat accurate. The rest of the week my knee can typically be more accurate.
My “exclusive” 20% offer ends tonight! Oh my God……so this is my offer and mine alone? I am really going to regret not using this exclusive offer. Sorry folks, perhaps you’ll get your own exclusive offer some day.
I am going to miss out on yet another offer, although not exclusive it would seem. By their line it looks like they missed offering a discount on Down coats last time and some heads must have rolled.
The next one is mildly offensive. First of all just how would they know if my testosterone level was low? Might be a good guess on their part but it seems that is a pretty personal issue and I will use my own dipstick to check my testosterone level with no help form GNC!
Now seriously if I got a 350 K loan for $13.04 a month it would take me like 400 years to pay it off. I didn’t just fall off the applecart….especially using that archaic phrase.
I really love the buffet survival strategy book. I could write that book….it would say AVOID BUFFETS. I wonder how much I could sell that book for?
And finally the one email line that actually makes some sense. Fall has arrived! Wait…..has it?? Or have I slept for a month? I have to stop taking that Ambien…perhaps I’ll get an email from GNC about getting some help sleeping! I can’t wait!
So that’s my exciting list of spam email for now. I obviously have more when I returned home but I think I’ve made my point. This stuff wears me out and it is hard to believe that people are employed out in cyberland to just continually molest people with this type of junk e-mail. I want to interview someone some day that states they were a junk mail creator just so I can communicate how thankful I am.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Random Thoughts
As I sit here in Orlando International Airport my mind wanders and I begin to observe people and also allow my brain to ponder things that most people, for good reason, do not. So here are a few of those random thoughts, etc.
The first thing is it seems that any airport in the world that wants more noteriety puts the tag international in front of its name. It would seem that if an immigrant is employed by the airport it qualifies As international.
It also occurs to me there are a few groups of people always doing battle. The people that have kids, have had kids, have never had kids and who are planning to have kids. I'm sure that no matter where you fall you have made instant judgements about the others. I am in the group, obvious to most, of having had kids. I wish I was better at connecting to young children. I don't seem to have a problem with teens on up but for some inexplicable reason I have difficulty with the droolers.....and yes I am referring to the young droolers. Just a self observation.
On the kids topic, when did so many parents stop being parents? I am talking about those parents that think most any large store is a play land for their children and basically no rules apply.
Another related thought is I'm curious where common civility went. People are so quick to make
Judgements of others. How has that happened? Have we as a society lost all patience and understanding of strangers? Assumptions have taken the place of learning. I realize I'm using a broad brush and many I associate with don't fall in this category. This is just a general observation and airports are a great place to make those.
Another thought that will tick off most everyone. I think they should lock the overhead bins in planes and make people check everything. I get so tired of the people who carry a two week supply of clothing, supplies, furniture and who knows what else on the plane and attempt to cram their stuff in an overhead bin. It sure would speed up the boarding and unboarding process. I know many of you think you beat the man at his game of charging you extra and you have but remember this when you have 10 minutes to get off your plane and make it all the way across the Dallas Airport....who wins then?
Ok, time for me to go get worked over by the TSA. Just some thoughts that probably most have considered a waste of time to read. I win this time!
The first thing is it seems that any airport in the world that wants more noteriety puts the tag international in front of its name. It would seem that if an immigrant is employed by the airport it qualifies As international.
It also occurs to me there are a few groups of people always doing battle. The people that have kids, have had kids, have never had kids and who are planning to have kids. I'm sure that no matter where you fall you have made instant judgements about the others. I am in the group, obvious to most, of having had kids. I wish I was better at connecting to young children. I don't seem to have a problem with teens on up but for some inexplicable reason I have difficulty with the droolers.....and yes I am referring to the young droolers. Just a self observation.
On the kids topic, when did so many parents stop being parents? I am talking about those parents that think most any large store is a play land for their children and basically no rules apply.
Another related thought is I'm curious where common civility went. People are so quick to make
Judgements of others. How has that happened? Have we as a society lost all patience and understanding of strangers? Assumptions have taken the place of learning. I realize I'm using a broad brush and many I associate with don't fall in this category. This is just a general observation and airports are a great place to make those.
Another thought that will tick off most everyone. I think they should lock the overhead bins in planes and make people check everything. I get so tired of the people who carry a two week supply of clothing, supplies, furniture and who knows what else on the plane and attempt to cram their stuff in an overhead bin. It sure would speed up the boarding and unboarding process. I know many of you think you beat the man at his game of charging you extra and you have but remember this when you have 10 minutes to get off your plane and make it all the way across the Dallas Airport....who wins then?
Ok, time for me to go get worked over by the TSA. Just some thoughts that probably most have considered a waste of time to read. I win this time!
Monday, August 29, 2011
Happy 25th to my "Little" Girl......
So my little girl turns 25 tomorrow. It just doesn’t seem possible. She has had more than her share of adversity. Losing her Mom would be right at the top but she also has had other significant challenges to overcome. I have been proud of her over the years for her accomplishments. I have laughed and even cried at different times about her. One thing has remained a constant. She will always be my little girl and I will always love her.
Another thing that makes me so proud is how she has taken her career and is really making something of it. She has never been satisfied at being a mediocre teacher. She has also faced and overcome an administrator that had only one thing on her mind and that was to make her fail. Not only did she prove this administrator to be the failure she has taken flight and her growth as a teacher continues and she doesn’t look back at the people that may have tried to derail her but only ahead at how she can become an even more gifted teacher than she already is. Whoever the student is that falls under her guidance is a blessed student in my eyes.
Linda and I have already given her the gift for reaching this 25th year however my gift has been these 25 years. I can’t imagine them without her in our lives and I really and truly look forward to many more years to come. So happy birthday Marlee….Linda is proud….I am proud….and your Mother in heaven is proud.
Another thing that makes me so proud is how she has taken her career and is really making something of it. She has never been satisfied at being a mediocre teacher. She has also faced and overcome an administrator that had only one thing on her mind and that was to make her fail. Not only did she prove this administrator to be the failure she has taken flight and her growth as a teacher continues and she doesn’t look back at the people that may have tried to derail her but only ahead at how she can become an even more gifted teacher than she already is. Whoever the student is that falls under her guidance is a blessed student in my eyes.
Linda and I have already given her the gift for reaching this 25th year however my gift has been these 25 years. I can’t imagine them without her in our lives and I really and truly look forward to many more years to come. So happy birthday Marlee….Linda is proud….I am proud….and your Mother in heaven is proud.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
My Take On Twitter
Ah yes Twitter. My curiosity got the best of me so I started an account. So for several days now I have been trying to wrap my mind around just what Twitter is all about. Last night as I laid in bed trying to wait for my fertile (ya right) mind to shut down I had an epiphany about what Twitter is and why it has caught on in some circles.
For those of you who have lived in the woods without the benefit of technology for the last year I will now let the wisdom descend upon you and like toilet paper in the sewage system assimilate in your mind. I really need to work on my analogies. Twitter is basically a collection of one liners, be they serious, funny or somewhere in-between. The unique thing about Twitter is many celebrities use it so it seems to be some way for all the # 1 fans out there to feel validated.
That is in a nutshell what Twitter is and now let me tell you why it has become popular. I can some it up in two words: attention span. As a society we no longer have one. We basically have little to do with anything that isn’t resolved in a few minutes. I even heard a radio talk show host spout off about how she can’t sit through a whole movie. Really? So Twitter requires basically no attention span and people really love that. (it seems)
There’s another reason I think it’s popular. It takes almost zero effort to engage in it. No work equals massive popularity amongst the current crop of homosapiens. Let’s face it, we are so embroiled in our day to day activities be it work or as my cousin in a far away land calls it retirement. To his credit he is an avid reader so he doesn’t necessarily fit the broad mold I am casting. People just don’t want to be involved in anything that requires much effort. That’s my take and since I’m writing this it is the only take that matters.
So there you have it. Twitter and all the twits engaged in it doing their tweeting are now explained to my vast mountain of reader. (No typo there) Twitter is basically a mindless activity that requires its fans to only have to structure one sentence at a time. BRILLIANT! ( Hey that might be my next tweet)
For those of you who have lived in the woods without the benefit of technology for the last year I will now let the wisdom descend upon you and like toilet paper in the sewage system assimilate in your mind. I really need to work on my analogies. Twitter is basically a collection of one liners, be they serious, funny or somewhere in-between. The unique thing about Twitter is many celebrities use it so it seems to be some way for all the # 1 fans out there to feel validated.
That is in a nutshell what Twitter is and now let me tell you why it has become popular. I can some it up in two words: attention span. As a society we no longer have one. We basically have little to do with anything that isn’t resolved in a few minutes. I even heard a radio talk show host spout off about how she can’t sit through a whole movie. Really? So Twitter requires basically no attention span and people really love that. (it seems)
There’s another reason I think it’s popular. It takes almost zero effort to engage in it. No work equals massive popularity amongst the current crop of homosapiens. Let’s face it, we are so embroiled in our day to day activities be it work or as my cousin in a far away land calls it retirement. To his credit he is an avid reader so he doesn’t necessarily fit the broad mold I am casting. People just don’t want to be involved in anything that requires much effort. That’s my take and since I’m writing this it is the only take that matters.
So there you have it. Twitter and all the twits engaged in it doing their tweeting are now explained to my vast mountain of reader. (No typo there) Twitter is basically a mindless activity that requires its fans to only have to structure one sentence at a time. BRILLIANT! ( Hey that might be my next tweet)
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
A Little Tribute To My Bride
There are some things about my life I am so thankful to talk about; those special things that make my life so complete and such a celebration. One of those parts of my life is my lovely wife. She is so humble that she won’t agree with half of what I say here but it won’t stop me now. (In fact it’s never stopped me before either)
I met this lady when I really thought I was through having any serious relationship. After losing my previous wife in such a difficult way I thought that the rest of my life I was going it alone. God apparently thought different. I couldn’t be happier he did.
This woman has taught me so much about myself and about others. She has shown me ultimate grace under fire. She is selfless when it comes to others. She is oh so patient with me and all of my flaws. Four years ago she looked cancer square in the eyes and said NOT ME. She even took that time in her life to look for ways to inspire and comfort others. Even now she plans to volunteer in her retirement to help others afflicted with this disease. You know there is an old saying that goes something like this: “Character is not revealed in victories but in challenges”. Her character was definitely revealed and it is above reproach.
I don’t want to dwell on the cancer because she would be the first to say she doesn’t want to be defined by that. She has moved on and thank God I am moving with her. She works tirelessly for the United Methodist Conference in nurturing new clergy through the ordination process. Nurturing is another gift of hers and she is exactly in the right place at the right time for the Methodist Church.
This lady of mine has not always had it easy in her life. Her family like many families these days is fragmented and not without its own challenges. She grew up in less than ideal circumstances at times but her faith and her amazing spirit saw her through those times.
So I write this today because it is her birthday. Birthdays tend to remind us how blessed we are in this life. As long as this lady is by my side my life will be not only happy but complete. We don’t know the will of the almighty but I do know that the blessings we are handed need to be treated with respect and honor. So on this day I wanted to do this in a most public way for my bride.
I love you Linda….and every day I am able to draw breath with you by my side is a gift I will never take for granted.
I met this lady when I really thought I was through having any serious relationship. After losing my previous wife in such a difficult way I thought that the rest of my life I was going it alone. God apparently thought different. I couldn’t be happier he did.
This woman has taught me so much about myself and about others. She has shown me ultimate grace under fire. She is selfless when it comes to others. She is oh so patient with me and all of my flaws. Four years ago she looked cancer square in the eyes and said NOT ME. She even took that time in her life to look for ways to inspire and comfort others. Even now she plans to volunteer in her retirement to help others afflicted with this disease. You know there is an old saying that goes something like this: “Character is not revealed in victories but in challenges”. Her character was definitely revealed and it is above reproach.
I don’t want to dwell on the cancer because she would be the first to say she doesn’t want to be defined by that. She has moved on and thank God I am moving with her. She works tirelessly for the United Methodist Conference in nurturing new clergy through the ordination process. Nurturing is another gift of hers and she is exactly in the right place at the right time for the Methodist Church.
This lady of mine has not always had it easy in her life. Her family like many families these days is fragmented and not without its own challenges. She grew up in less than ideal circumstances at times but her faith and her amazing spirit saw her through those times.
So I write this today because it is her birthday. Birthdays tend to remind us how blessed we are in this life. As long as this lady is by my side my life will be not only happy but complete. We don’t know the will of the almighty but I do know that the blessings we are handed need to be treated with respect and honor. So on this day I wanted to do this in a most public way for my bride.
I love you Linda….and every day I am able to draw breath with you by my side is a gift I will never take for granted.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
My Thoughts on Casey Anthony.....
The recent events in the court room cause me to ponder our justice system. It is still the best system in the world……I think.
Anyone who has had any experience in our justice machine is pretty much aware that where the courtroom begins, common sense ends. This Casey Anthony case is yet another in a long string of very high profile cases that proves that assertion. Let’s look at this a moment…..no DNA, no determinant cause of death, no murder weapon and no apparent witnesses. Those are the facts. If you looked at those facts only as apparently the jury did then she is not guilty. Now the common sense facts that can also not be disputed…she waited 30 days to report the little girl missing….during those 30 days she had relations with 6 different men, went out on the town frequently and never seemed to have a care in the world. Once the story broke and the authorities were brought in she continually lied and misled them about the entire course of events. Even now after the verdict I see little concern on the mother’s part or any of that dysfunctional family to find out what really happened to that little girl.
Almost everyone I hear on the talking head shows believes this woman was complicit but many can only look at this case through the very narrow prism of what they claim are the rules of law.
Now all of you intellectual types that purport reasonable doubt as being the standard for determining guilt win yet again. How about unreasonable doubt? How about lawyers turning what common sense logic should be into reasonable doubt? Perhaps the real problem is the majority of people sitting on a jury aren’t intelligent enough to get out of jury duty. I hope that’s not the real problem here because jury duty really is a civic duty. It is just troubling that people being people can’t look at a case entirely and not just intellectually in an almost machine-like process devoid of any emotion or common sense.
So that’s my rail on our justice system. In my heart of hearts I think we have a good system and we are still a people that must live under a rule of law. Just keep in mind that we are people…not robots and as such we should be able to examine all circumstances behind a death to determine through reasoned logic what we think really happened. When we loose that, we loose our humanity.
Anyone who has had any experience in our justice machine is pretty much aware that where the courtroom begins, common sense ends. This Casey Anthony case is yet another in a long string of very high profile cases that proves that assertion. Let’s look at this a moment…..no DNA, no determinant cause of death, no murder weapon and no apparent witnesses. Those are the facts. If you looked at those facts only as apparently the jury did then she is not guilty. Now the common sense facts that can also not be disputed…she waited 30 days to report the little girl missing….during those 30 days she had relations with 6 different men, went out on the town frequently and never seemed to have a care in the world. Once the story broke and the authorities were brought in she continually lied and misled them about the entire course of events. Even now after the verdict I see little concern on the mother’s part or any of that dysfunctional family to find out what really happened to that little girl.
Almost everyone I hear on the talking head shows believes this woman was complicit but many can only look at this case through the very narrow prism of what they claim are the rules of law.
Now all of you intellectual types that purport reasonable doubt as being the standard for determining guilt win yet again. How about unreasonable doubt? How about lawyers turning what common sense logic should be into reasonable doubt? Perhaps the real problem is the majority of people sitting on a jury aren’t intelligent enough to get out of jury duty. I hope that’s not the real problem here because jury duty really is a civic duty. It is just troubling that people being people can’t look at a case entirely and not just intellectually in an almost machine-like process devoid of any emotion or common sense.
So that’s my rail on our justice system. In my heart of hearts I think we have a good system and we are still a people that must live under a rule of law. Just keep in mind that we are people…not robots and as such we should be able to examine all circumstances behind a death to determine through reasoned logic what we think really happened. When we loose that, we loose our humanity.
Friday, July 1, 2011
My Pride And Joy
There is simply no more intense gift than the gift of seeing your offspring succeed. You spend many sometimes difficult years trying to impart your wisdom of experience and yet seeing when they finally “get it”……it’s one of those moments in time when pride can overcome you. This happened to me recently. It is a moment that only a parent can fully appreciate. It’s even more intense because when they do finally understand the things you’ve tried to teach then you suddenly understand your own parent’s previous heartaches as well as proud moments. It is almost a double moment of self revelation.
I am blessed. Those words can’t be overused in my opinion. It’s one thing to grow up and try to do things right for yourself and try to succeed for yourself but it is quite another to have a son or daughter display signs of success and winning in life. My daughter recently wrote a blog addressing some of life’s lessons that she has come to understand and not through always the easiest of paths. I think some of her revelations are lessons I am still learning. That is awe inspiring to me.
So a lesson for me is how someone you try to guide through life…thinking you may have the answers….ends up teaching you something special. How good is that? So I suppose we did something right. Am I proud? You bet I am. Am I bragging? Right on count two as well.
Basically it is quite easy to look around and find all of the negatives in this life. I choose to, at least for this moment, to enjoy the recent successes of my little girl. Life is hard enough to not ignore the victories. So way to go Ms. Bourey……my favorite teacher of all time!
I am blessed. Those words can’t be overused in my opinion. It’s one thing to grow up and try to do things right for yourself and try to succeed for yourself but it is quite another to have a son or daughter display signs of success and winning in life. My daughter recently wrote a blog addressing some of life’s lessons that she has come to understand and not through always the easiest of paths. I think some of her revelations are lessons I am still learning. That is awe inspiring to me.
So a lesson for me is how someone you try to guide through life…thinking you may have the answers….ends up teaching you something special. How good is that? So I suppose we did something right. Am I proud? You bet I am. Am I bragging? Right on count two as well.
Basically it is quite easy to look around and find all of the negatives in this life. I choose to, at least for this moment, to enjoy the recent successes of my little girl. Life is hard enough to not ignore the victories. So way to go Ms. Bourey……my favorite teacher of all time!
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